Thursday, June 2, 2011

Security Threat Assessment Board (STAB)

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A previously unknown strain of Reaver Vomit has been discovered in the outlands area of Hale's Moon. Since there is not actual report of any kind of reaver attacks, we are presently at "Guarded" Security Threat Level Awareness. This is a general risk of reaver attacks, which is Hale means that you walk around armed but not with your gun drawn.

Recent crossfire episodes on Mu Draconis prompted Zenobia’s Security Threat Assessment Board (STAB) to raise the Security Level Rating from “Petty” to “Tedious“ and now to “Tiresome“. If STAB upgrades the security level rating to “Nuisance“ then maybe I install the Guided Rocket Offensive Security System (GROSS). We’re not zoned for missile defense at the Zenobian Maison, I will have to bribe ummmm request the High Magistrate for permission.
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The Avalon Moritoring Station reported that dirtside Avalon at Evangeline Island maintained its normal hubbub level of activity while the arrival of Independent Cargo Transports to the Trade Station warranted monitors to be on watch for any brouhaha in case any idle crews become destructive in their need for distraction. If any actual brouhaha breaks out, security will be raised to prevent escalation to a full hullabulloo. No higgledy-piggledy or katzenjammers have been reported in several months.

Zenobian Department of Kremlinological Analysis over at the pub theorized that the Orions employ a similar Security Level Rating. “No worries, let’s have a party”, “It’ll all be alright, let’s have a party” and “Let’s have a ‘row and then throw a party”. Theoretically there is no Security Threat Level that has every cancelled an Orion party, although they have rescheduled erotic poetry until after the ‘row. The Myrmidons appear to have only two modes, “Pissed” and “Get ‘em.” The United System’s Directorate has increased its alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Military Gear and Strut about". Recent conflicts have shown that they also have two higher levels: "Invade Neighbor" and "Dispose of Ally.@ The Federationalists are difficult to assess. “Reports”, “Denial” and “Alienate Allies". Many factions have very practical Security Level Ratings such as "Shout and Complain", "Collaborate", "Military Posturing", "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

I can’t be too critical. The few people that ran cargo with me when I was an independent salvage pilot, know my often repeated strategic maneuvers 1 and 2 to be “run” and “hide”.

Recently at the Al Raqis Landsraat, I heard from the Chief Magistrate that official local term for the recent conflict between the Myrmidians and the USD was a kerfuffle, which I think qualifies as a higgledy-piggledy but less than a katzenjammer.
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An axample of a hullabaloo happened a week or so earlier when some escapees from some Galifreyan Bipolar Attention Span Deficit Disorder Inpatient Clinic Hospital (G-Basddich). They stole the official shuttle of one of the factions and spouting out about fezzes, Jammie Dodgers and the Silence.
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The factions on Al Raqis are a quite rivalous by nature, but these 3 morons brought out the teamwork. Klinzhai, USF, USD and even myself as an observer. Now that's quality hullabaloo.
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Here is the USF generously allowing the Klinzhai CO to test a missile launcher.
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See that? It's all about love and cooperation between the Federationalists and the Klinzhai.

The Klinzhai's offer of scientific aid to the USD was rejected and thus....Klinzhai Kerfuffle. Ah well.

I did a little bit of consulting for House Orion. House Zenobia has been assisting the Orion Swords to acclimate ever since they arrived in MuDraco over a year ago. I actually knew their former leader from Botany Bay of all places. Here I am setting up radiuses to show Seska and Prime Advocate Auryn the distances from the street and undertown where one can eavesdrop without special equipment.
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Seren Undercroft sent Zeno and I this great image of Zenobia from the direction of its approach from Paqin. The moon is Avalon. The two large yellow orbs are the protostars Qin and Lux. Santo orbits Qin, Persephone orbits Lux. The small white orb is Murphy where Shadow is. This is essentially our major trade route thru the core. Zenobia to Santos to Persephone to Shadow. Because they are protostars, there is a large and ready and inexpensive supply of fusionable fuels. Likewise in the other direction is Paquin which orbits Heinlein, which is our first stop into the Red Sun system.
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Because of our orbital distance and location, it is never actually dark in Zenobia. We only get about 80% of the peak light of Old Earth That Was Normal, but you can read outside at "night". It means that a lot of crepuscular species like deer and moose do well. Because of our super long, but relatively cool shaded days, we probably grow the best Garlic, Ginger, Ginseng, Onions, Goldenseal and Canabis in the 'Verse. Orchids and the Saffron Crocus do well.

I was doing a pickup and some transhipment in Evangeline from Tevya. He told me divers reported that an Alliance Submarine was spotted in the deep harbor.
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Over at the Hanso Minos Base in Hale, I ran into Desmond. I know he got married again recently to some young chippie. It's the 26th century, if you got a little bit of work done at the surgeons, just admit it. Using a little bit of hair gel is also nothing to be ashamed of.
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But noooooo, he goes on to tell me that there was some kind of temporal event that caused the Minos to go back in time 40 years. How gullible does he think I am? I step in and its 40 years earlier, I step out its the present. As far as lies go to cover up for plastic surgery, this is one of the worst ever. EVER!

He even got Frog to pretend he was Gallagher from 40 years ago. I played along and warned him about the stalker that would ruin his life. We supposed bought stock in Weyland Yutani, Blue Sun, Cortex, Cyberdyne, Umbrella and a few others. But I notice I am not a billionaire in the present.
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Miss x0x0 takes casual day way too far. For some reason she decides to use the public shower. ZOGMYDOGZILLA! NO! Don't do it. There is a sign warning about thieves. Sure enough, someone stole her clothes. She was all hot to get someone to inspect her towels, not sure what that was about. Probably just wanted someone to pay attention to her troubles. Deputy Ibram was proper enough to keep his back turned to Miss xoxo. Gallagher said that he would turture, ummmm question the usual suspects.
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It is currently under investigation. Also, Frog's red bicycle is missing.

WHODAT!
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In an effort to show that Hale is furry friendly, Neelix was deputized by the Sheriff's Office and also made the manager of the local Hanso Office. We don't know where Feral went off to.

The pressure of training has been hard on Neelix, he has taken to smoking.
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Training has been rigorous, but sadly the work hard play hard lifestyle of law enforcement can lead to drinking.
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High strung lower primate....
Overwork him....
High Stress Job....
Smoking and Drinking.....
DON'T GIVE HIM A GUN!
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